Belated Birthday Gift

I'm late. I keep thinking I'll have my HOMEMADE birthday gift wrapped up, and it keeps taking a bit longer. So here, Mom, is a little preview.

No Extra Baggage

I made it back from Nashville with no extra pounds. Yes! Probably because Karen had me moving furniture and Mom had us hanging wall paper in her bathroom.....worked off the cookies and fudge. I found a Pilates tape for beginners at a garage sale for 50 cents, probably not as entertaining as the Wii Fit, but definitely cheaper.

In case you wanna stay tuned...

I created a blog just for my nanny-tales and such. I can only hope it will add to your cheap entertainment. ;)

http://www.nomadicnanny.blogspot.com

As you all know, Erin is planning on attending the University of Arkansas this fall.
So, we went up there last Sunday for orientation. (she's too big for her mama to go along with her),
So, I hung out with my oldest sister, Sandy who lives up there in Fayetteville. You all know Sandy!
Anyway, the point is- the 5 lbs. I had lost that took me 5 WEEKS to lose, unfortunately I gained back 4 of them Ain't that a "kick in the head"! or butt as it were. That just irritates me to no end. My sister is a terrible influence on me. And her little 11 year old grand-daughter just wants to make dessert for every meal. And they held a gun to my head and made me eat them! brownies, chocolate peanut butter cups, etc.
I admit, I have no will power any more. It's just too dang hot to diet. Or, I am too old to diet. Or, I have a ferret and I can't diet. (I got all kinds of excuses.) Dieting is NOT my favorite thing.

Equaling out the scale.

I haven't posted in awhile but I read your posts every day. I don't have much to add, either. I've started helping Jerry, Jill's dad, with his painting jobs which require much physical exertion and results in loads of sweat but unfortunately the grocery store had a deal going on this week: Buy 2 12-packs, get 3 free!

So I have 5 cases of Pepsi product in my kitchen cabinet...scooted far back so I have to reach in to get it in hopes that the extra effort will serve as a deterrent to boredom-binging.

So one step forward, two steps back. If our family were to have a coat of arms with a motto, that would be it. Written in cursive for a deceptively elegant feel.

Here's a picture of Mom's...squash? From the vegetable garden Carmen and Mom built.

I think we need to start a list of all of the stories we want Mom to write about . . .

Turtles
German Shepherd helping me escape over the fence
Floor bouncer
The cat bite and rabies scare
Road trips
Baby swing in the store display window
Tony and Travis changing diapers
Church while weaning Tony from breast feeding
Who threw the shoe in church?
Getting Old Blue
Driving Old Blue with water splashing up through the rotten floorboards
Carmen and Linda wrecking Old Blue
The cat burial after the big storm

In fact, I think we need to create a family story book and get it published. Personal publishing has become very affordable.

Okay, now here is some injustice right here in our own family.
Tony has lost 20 lbs. and HE WASN'T EVEN TRYING!!!!!
I don't know about everyone else, but I am upset.
Course, he got a buzz haircut, too. What was he thinking?
I never realized what a HUGE head he had until the "buzz".
Must be that size in order to hold all those brains.

Okay, ya'll. My mom said this was some cheap entertainment and she was right. I love seeing the sisters' witty and clever remarks towards each other. Why watch TV when I can blog? Now, I know where my dad gets his wit and his "smarty pants" attitude.
A word to each of ya'll-
Patti, glad you could join the family on here.

Megan, I'm so excited for you! Living in New York will be quite the experience I'm sure. Find a hot guy who works on Wall Street and make sure he has a cute brother too because I do plan on coming to visit.

Karen, there is no shame in drinking Route 44's. We are very open about our Sonic addiction so no need to hide it. My mom is the worst anyway and I'm sure she has you beat. I'm going to say she had 4 Routes the other day...yeah, I'm pretty sure she did actually.

Honey Gail, what is this Wii exercise game you speak of? I didn't know exercise could be fun. Please inform me. The only time I've ever played Wii was when this five year old boy humiliated me and beat the tar out of me at tennis. I guess video games are not my forte.

Grandma, I just love your reminiscent stories on here. Tell the story of the turtles! I think I've heard it but I need to hear it again.

Carmen, how is the reunion planning coming along? When are you coming back to Dallas for a visit? I know I shouldn't mention this but there is this Mexican restaurant that just opened up the street that we used to go to all the time when they had another one down in Addison. I got really excited when I saw they brought a location up here because they have this cheese dip that is just to die for. So, forget the diet, come to Dallas and play and we'll take you to get some good grub. That goes for all of you! It's summer time and we want some house guests up here! PRONTO!


As far as me being on a diet...I'm not really. It's hard when my mom buys me a pint of my favorite ice cream ever and FORCES me to eat it. She's so cruel.
I do walk at night though so at least I get SOME exercise. Of course, the last week was a total waste since I ate that ice cream. It was worth it though.

Love to all,

Erin

OH MY GOSH!!!
THIS IS SOOOOO ENTERTAINING!!!!!

NYC & 23!

So, I went to New Jersey to meet with my potential employers and their family. I spent three days in the twilight zone. You wouldn't believe these people! Prepping those poor pre-teen boys for IVY LEAGUE already?? Ok, so I'm just bitter because they didn't want me. Well, they DID want me... before they found out I'm a criminal. You see, dear family, I've been in jail four times. Did you know that? I'm sure you did. Secrets don't exist where we come from. Anyway, two of those arrests show up on my background check. No convictions! But the document lists the arrest details whether I like it or not and it'll cost me $1100 to get rid of it all. Anyway, instead of signing the release form for these folks, I just came clean and told 'em straight. I told 'em exactly what they'd see: I was arrested for "theft under $50" after I got caught shoplifting a belt from Folley's when I was 17... And I was driving with an invalid driver's license two years back. (I continued to explain that the invalid driver's license was merely a result of poverty, but that was a big waste of breath!)

Needless to say, they said "NO THANKS" and that was that.

However, I found a young, poor, artsy-fartsy family in Brooklyn that will be taking me in for a couple months with a weekly stipend of $150/wk. Yeah... yeah... I know. But I'll manage! While I'm there, I'll be looking for something more substantial. It's very possible I'll be back home in two months with empty pockets and a hungry belly, but I gotta get up there and see what all the fuss is about - just for a year or two, at most, then back to school.

I leave on June 28th!

Mom keeps reminding me I have to come back south for this family reunion next June. No reminder necessary, Mom! I can't wait!

Love you guys. Cross those fingers for me?

Thoughts about Losing Weight

I would join y'all on this weight loss program, but Mom keeps buying rootbeer and putting it in her fridge. She stopped putting the bite-size snickers in the pockets of my uniforms after she irons them, but still has the bowl of them sitting in her kitchen. I only have so much self-discipline!!
If I want to lose weight, I'll have to give up rootbeer, snickers, and going to Mom's place. That means I'd have to iron my own uniforms while suffering thru sugar withdrawals. Is weight loss really worth all that?
And is anyone really serious about this? Y'all aren't saying much. Are you too busy exercising? Are you quietly sitting at Sonic having a Route 44 and hoping we don't find out? Are you secretly hoping the whole subject of weight loss will go away if you ignore it long enough? I just want to know cause if I start this program, I want someone around to listen to me gripe until I can gloat.
I think a weekly report should be required.

Well, I'm going to think about it for a while longer . . .
at least until after I finish my Route 44.